Title: The End Of The Beginning
Title: Dead heartbeats mean life
Pairing: Xander/Spike (eventually)
Overall Rating: NC17
Chapter Rating: PG13
Beta: shakatany - enough said.
Disclaimer: Joss is all.
AN: Again, everyone say thank you to shakatany (seriously, you'd have to wait twice as long between chapters), who's getting these to me less than 24 hours after I email them.
Closing his eyes Xander stood still and just... breathed. Breaths that didn't come with worries about Dawn's safety, and what the electric bill was going to look like, and whether he should consider getting the teen a computer for Christmas, worries that had been choking him. He just stood and existed. It was absolute bliss.
He hadn't realised he'd walked forward until he was hidden in the press of humans, demons and things he didn't even have a name for. Smiling his first real smile in what felt like a lifetime - and in a way it was - he tossed his head back, simply moving. For once he didn't think about how he'd look, or whether he'd embarrass anyone, or himself. He lived for that heavy bass that became his heartbeat, unsure whether the body he was currently pressed against was human, and not really caring either way.
Grinning into decidedly demon looking eyes he rolled his body against light blue skin, laughing in delight at the look of pleased shock on the strangely feline face. Then he was movement again; whirling away to press against another demon with large floppy ears that reminded him of a cocker spaniel, chuckling slightly at the new twist on raining cats and dogs that seemed to pop into his head from nowhere. His dance partner didn't seem at all offended by the laugh, so he did it again, full throated and real.
He came down from his high just enough to notice his body‘s demand for liquid, moving away from the freedom of crowd-anonymity and towards the bar. Asking the bar-demon (because he sure wasn’t a barman) for a coke, he practically had to shout over the loud music and loved the slight strain it placed on his still raw throat. Before he could hand over payment there were alabaster fingers on his wrist, restraining him though they barely touched skin, and he watched as those fingers passed the bartender a folded bill. Cocking his head he was still smiling when he turned to meet familiar blue eyes.
"Didn't know you could dance, pet." There was no mocking in Spike's tone, just curiosity and a touch of admiration.
"Neither did I," he admitted with yet another grin and god did it feel good to smile.
He downed the coke in all of five seconds and grabbed those familiar fingers on an impulse, dragging them both back onto the dance floor. He didn't think about expectations or preconceptions as he let that cool body press against his back. He didn't notice the look of absolute shock on the blond's face melt into a softer expression. He didn't think at all, just moved.
When the beat changed for something low and needful he didn't pull away, just dropped his head back on a cool shoulder, gasping slightly for breath, still more movement than thought. He realised with a slight sense of detachment that Spike must have shed his duster at some point - though he couldn't have said whether the vampire'd had it on when Xander had led him onto the dance floor - because the fabric against the back of his neck was soft.
If the brunet hadn't still been lost in music, he probably would have balked when he pressed back further, wanting to feel that soft fabric against as much of himself as he could get. Clenching his fingers unconsciously, he was surprised to find worn denim between them, the slender hips under the fabric so unlike his own. When the small movement earned him a happy sigh he felt down to his toes he did it again, drawing those hips closer against him.
Again the beat changed, this time sliding just under his skin and letting his heart find its own rhythm again; firm pulses that made him feel alive. Turning in time to the beat in his chest, rather than the one trying, without malicious intent, to pull him under again, he smiled into sapphire eyes.
Later, when Spike would tell him again that it was just adrenalin and blood, he'd say he was still lost in that intoxicating beat washing over him. But for now he granted himself the truth, knowing he was really awake for the first time in a long time, and it was all thanks to the vampire in front of him. He knew all he'd get in return was a sneer and a familiar jibe, but still he moved forward, sighing softly against lips that always seemed to taste like cold fire and freedom.
The first brush was barely a hint of a touch, but when he wasn't immediately pushed away he smiled - a little sadly because he knew how this would end - and let his lips press firmly against all that life packed into a still body. He said thank you the only way he knew couldn't be brushed off, telling the blond that no, he wasn't alright... but he would be. And it was all thanks to Spike.
Pulling back slowly he let his lips brush against a smooth forehead for a moment, sighing a hot breath against all that cool skin. Smiling again into a stunned face, Xander said the words anyway, wanting to make sure that the vampire really knew.
"Thank you, Spike."